10 Things Every Mum Did

That looking back on, confuse you greatly…

Telling you that she’d “wash your mouth out with soap” if you swore.

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But why mum? Yuck.

Turning down the music to park or see a road sign.

 

 

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Because #logic. 

 

Putting plastic bags in another plastic bag and storing so many she had enough for a lifetime of non-environmentally friendly grocery shopping.

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But why mum? 

Telling you to clean your room because ‘the cleaner is coming’.

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Eh? Ma, that makes zero sense. 

Calling you for dinner and it’s not even close to being ready.

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The actual fuq mum. 

Swimming around while trying to keep her hair dry.

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Why do mums do this? It’s part of the fun. 

Putting shells in a vase and thinking she was interior #goals. 

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That she bought in bulk at the $2 store or illegally swiped from the reef on your last family vaycay. 

Telling you “there’s fruit in the bowl” when you tell her you’re hungry.

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I want some biscuits for christ’s sake mum. 

Letting you know you got mail today.

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Gee, I’m glad my suitors can send DP’s via text. 

Leaving one of these bad boys on the counter as a warning.

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T’was a weapon of ass destruction. 

 

 

 

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